Celebrity Rehab - The Worst Kind

Man, VH1's Celebrity Rehab is chock full of bad acting. I will leave Rodney King and Gary Busey out of this. I am not going to slam King (even though his story keeps changing) because what happened to him was truly appalling. Who wouldn't start drinking their ass off after a bunch of honky pigs beat them to a pulp? Busey, well, he is just a complete nutcase, and it doesn't surprise me that he has brain damage one bit. The dude needs a mental hospital though, not rehab. Holy hell, spending time with "Dr." Busey would totally give me a drug craving. Anyway, lets talk about these other "people"...

OK, that American Idol bitch Niki McKibbin is disgusting. I think she used to be a bit attractive from what I can remember, but now she just looks like a fatty small town hillbilly. Clearly from the sight of her fat ass, she hasn't done ENOUGH cocaine. Boohoo, her Mom died. Happens to people everyday bitch, deal with it. Didn't she have a kid? I hope that thing is in a home somewhere.

Amber Smith, hmmm, she is pretty hot, but she seems like a real bitch. Big surprise there huh? Maybe she just isn't doing the RIGHT drugs? Put her on something to make her less of a crotchety old woman.

Steven Adler, man, I feel kind of bad for this guy. He genuinely seems like a nice guy. I saw Guns N' Roses back in the day, before they were huge, before that glossed over Use Your Illusion bullshit, when Steven was still in the band, and they played real rock 'n roll. That being said, I don't fully believe his story of being kicked out on the streets at the age of 11, blah, blah, blah. It just sounds too much like the typical tragic rock star fantasy. I do think he has had a rough life, I just think he has brought most of it on himself trying to live that rock star fairy tail like all his loser heroes. To me, rock star junkies are a complete cliche joke. Still, I would like to see Steve make it clean, but that is so doubtful.

Tawny Kitan, wow, hard to believe she can even be considered a celebrity. What the hell has she ever done besides hump a car in a cheesy hairband video in the 80's? She is also completely full of shit, and a terrible actor. I can tell a liar from a million miles away, and her story about making up this Tawny Persona on her way to school one day is complete bullshit. Hey Julie, fuck off, you are completely worthless in this world. Do us all a favor and overdose already.

The biggest mess on the show is easily Jeff Conaway. Back from season one, because he has an endless string of problems he is most likely never going to get past. He and Gary are probably the most entertainment in this show, but not for good reason. I kind of hate to slam the guy, even though he is so fucking over the top, so lets slam his GIRLFRIEND. I don't remember her name, but she is a horrible, horrible person that I wouldn't wish on the worst man...or woman. she is your typical LA drug addled hanger on who is obviously just with Jeff for his "celebrity" status. As full of shit as most of the people on this show are, none are more so than her. Jeff needs to wake up and get rid of her for good. I am sure he can find another chick to feed him his pills.

The worst of the worst on this show is Rod Stewart's son Sean. I really can't stand these young people that are born with 25 silver spoons in their mouth and just spend their time clubbing and getting fucked up, then all of a sudden cry addiction. FUUUUCK YOU! There are real people in this world, with real problems, things you would never understand. Nothing you can say will earn you sympathy from me. Aww, your Father was never around when you were a kid, he was always on tour, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, well my Dad was never around either, he was too busy drinking his time away down at the bar with all his loser friends, but you don't see me a damn junkie or drunk. Fuck that, that is the last thing I want to be. This guy just needs to be kicked to the curb and spit on. Grow some balls and lose the attitude you smug little twit.

I will end this by saying I want to bend Nurse Shelly over a desk....